The brief was ridiculous. Fly to South Korea, pick up the latest SsangYong Rexton and then drive it to the DMZ, the demilitarised zone that separates South from North. It’s a demilitarised zone that is surrounded by militarised zones. At a time when the US and North Korea were exchanging insults, and a time when North Korea was firing rockets further and further, the idea seemed the height of folly. We leapt at it.
But if you had to find yourself in a place where the bullets might fly, then being in the Rexton might not be such a bad place to be. Although if it’s a serious missile then it probably wouldn’t help much – it would take less than 45sec from launch for a North Korean nuke to hit Seoul and its 10m inhabitants.
We pondered such happy thoughts as we headed towards North Korea, which began to take on the doom-laden presence of Mordor. But if the world was about to end, what better way to go than making notes about a South Korean SUV? It would at least give my life meaning.
The notes indicate that the word ‘robust’ is well deserved. There’s a substantial chassis down below (mine proof?) with a large, strong body on top with plenty of space for everyone. The diesel engine has quite enough get up and go, and there’s four-wheel drive and a low-ratio transfer case for when the roads are clogged with zombies. And there’s plenty of room for supplies, so you can easily stock up on beans and ammo.
As we approached the DMZ we braced ourselves and looked out. It was worse than we thought. There was a funfair.
And a big car park, since this is a big tourist spot – of course it is. You can look across to the happy paradise that is North Korea and fulminate against those dastardly South Koreans putting up fences, mines and who knows what else, just to stop their citizens pouring North into Utopia.
At one point someone obviously had the optimistic thought that the country would be reunified, and there’s a deeply spooky station at Dorasan, inhabited only by tourists, who stare down at the rusting rails running into no-man’s land.
Shaking our heads, we head off-road, which shows up that the SUV feels really quite tough, even if the price is a rather jiggly ride. Tough, robust – you’re getting the picture. If it all goes horribly wrong, this wouldn’t be a bad vehicle to be in. But we’re happy to drive it back to Seoul. And then get on a plane to Europe.
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